Attorneys and The Art of Direct and Cross Examination
Attorney: Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?
Attorney: What happened then?
Witness: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me."
Attorney: Did he kill you?
Attorney: Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?
Attorney: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
Attorney: Were you alone or by yourself?
Attorney: How long have you been a French Canadian?
Attorney: Do you have any children or anything of that kind?
Attorney: I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture.
Witness: That's me.
Attorney: Were you present when that picture was taken?
Attorney: Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?
Attorney: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
Witness: By death.
Attorney: And by whose death was it terminated?
Attorney: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
Witness: I'll be three months on November 8.
Attorney: Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: What were you doing at that time?
Attorney: So you were gone until you returned?
Attorney: She had three children, right?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: How many were boys?
Witness: None.
Attorney: Were there girls?
Attorney: You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like, but can you describe it?
Attorney: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: And these stairs, did they go up also?
An attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your Honor, I'd like to strike the next question."
Attorney: Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr. Williamson at the rose Chapel?
Witness: It was in the evening. The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m.
Attorney: And Mr. Williamson was dead at the time, is that correct?
Witness: No, you stupid, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy!
Attorney: What is your brother-in-law's name?
Witness: Vorokin.
Attorney: What's his first name?
Witness: I can't remember.
Attorney: He's been your brother-in-law for years and you can't remember his name?
Witness: No. I tell you I'm too excited (rising from witness chair). Nathan, for God's sake tell him your name!
Attorney: Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?
Witness: I refuse to answer that question.
Attorney: Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?
Witness: I refuse to answer that question.
Attorney: Did you ever stay all night with that man in Miami?
Witness: No.
Attorney: Doctor, did you say he was shot in the woods?
Witness: No. I said he was shot in the lumbar region.
Attorney: What is your name?
Witness: Mary Ann Jones.
Attorney: And what is your marital status?
Witness: Fair.
Attorney: Are you married?
Witness: No, I'm divorced.
Attorney: And what did your husband do before you divorced him?
Witness: A lot of things I didn't know about.
Attorney: And who is this person you are speaking of?
Witness: My ex-widow said it.
Attorney: How did you happen to go to Dr. Smith?
Witness: Well, a gal down the road had had several of her children by him, and she said he was really good.
Attorney: Do you believe you are emotionally unstable?
Witness: I should be.
Attorney: And how many times have you committed suicide?
Witness: Four times.
Attorney: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
Witness: All my autopsies have been on dead people.
Attorney: Were you acquainted with the deceased?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: Before or after he died?
Attorney: Officer, what led you to believe this man was under the influence?
Witness: Because he was argumentinary and couldn't pronunciate his words.
Attorney: Mrs. Jones, is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice I sent to your attorney?
Witness: No. This is how I dress when I go to work.
Attorney: Now, as we begin, I must ask you to banish all present information and prejudice from your minds, if you have any.
Attorney: Did he pick the dog up by his ears?
Witness: No.
Attorney: What was he doing with the dog's ears?
Witness: Picking them up in the air?
Attorney: Where was the dog at this time?
Witness: Attached to the ears.
Prosecuting Attorney: When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and was able, for the time being excluding all restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?
Defense Attorney: Objection. That question should be taken out and shot.
Attorney: Gary, all your answers must be oral, okay? Now, what school did you go to?
Witness: Oral.
Attorney: What is your relationship with the plaintiff?
Witness: She is my daughter.
Attorney: And was she your daughter on February 13, 1979?
Attorney: Now you have investigated other murders, have you not, where there was a victim?
Attorney: And what did he do then?
Witness: He came home, and the next morning he was dead.
Attorney: So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?
Attorney: Did you tell your lawyer that your husband had offered you indignities?
Witness: He didn't offer me nothing but the furniture.
Attorney: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
Witness: Yes, I have been since early childhood.
Attorney: Were you shot in the fracas?
Witness: No. I was shot halfway between the fracas and the naval.
Attorney: What is the meaning of sperm being present?
Witness: It indicates intercourse.
Attorney: Male sperm?
Witness: That's the only kind I know.
Attorney: (showing a picture) That's you?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: Were you present when the picture was taken?
Attorney: When you came out of the anesthesia, what did you observe?
Witness: I had a skin graft. My whole buttocks and leg were removed and put on top of my head.
Attorney: Could you see him from where you were standing?
Witness: I could see his head.
Attorney: And where was his head?
Witness: Just above his shoulders.
Attorney: What can you tell us about the truthfulness and veracity of the defendant?
Witness: Oh, she will always tell the truth. She said she was going to kill that sonofabitch, and she did!
Attorney: Do you drink when you are on duty?
Witness: Not unless I come on duty drunk.
Attorney: Do you have any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial, instead of an attempted murder trial?
Witness: The victim lived.
Attorney: Are you sexually active?
Witness: No, I just lie there.
 The way back home.
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